It is not only at the poker table that a flush beats a full house.

EPIC FAIL

 Somebody broke into the police station and stole the only toilet in the joint. Right now the cops are anxious to find the perp but in the mean time they have nothing to go on.

James had been standing in his dark and dank cellar for well over and hour with his hands gripping a leaky pipe. The water spurted between his fingers. His shoes were getting wetter and wetter.

Suddenly he heard his wife's voice calling down the cellar door. "Honey, you can take your hands off that leak now!"

"Why," yelled James, "did the plumber finally get here?"

"No," responded his loving wife, "the torch you used to thaw the pipe at the other end set the house on fire..."